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AquaGoddess |
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July 27, 2007 ,
7:24 pm |
Looks like its been a while since I have posted on here. As I recently decided to delete this journal.. today I have come back to make an entry. I don’t think anyone will read this.. but if by some reason you are.. hai :) – you can send me a yahoo message or something to talk. Cuz Im sure it’s been a really long time. Aquagoddess1182@yahoo.com. Simple email works also.
Looks like a lot of my past friends have been getting divorced.. but not I. I’m still kickin it over here.. in NY. I think so far 3 of my past friends have decided it was time to kick the bucket. All I can say is that I’m sorry to hear about it and hopefully you can move on :) Like I should talk.. I probably should have been divorced a few years ago.. but things have somehow worked out for the best. Perhaps moving to New York has helped or being pregnant. Who knows..
I saw some of these past entries of mine.. wow I was such a drama queen. I guess in a way I can still be emotionally unstable but by far I am nothing like I was before. I guess I needed to grow up and that is what I have done. I’m pregnant with my 2nd and probably last child. Its a girl and I am 6 months along. As much as a joy pregnancy is supposed to be.. – Ive been in so much pain! I cant even clean at times… lol.
Honestly not a whole lot has been going on around me.. or with me. I play world of warcraft but not nearly as much as I did a year ago when I started. I sign on here and there but I hardly play. I should cancel my account but I have made some friends I enjoy talking to and being able to play with here and there to pass time. I miss concole games and I am working on getting a PS3 to get involved in. Its pretty much the only thing I have to pass time when my hubby is working and my child is in her on world or sleeping.
New York is not too bad. I dont like it at this post.. but the rest of it .. nice so far. HOT! I didnt think it would be this hot.. but it is. We are waiting until March to see where we can move off to. I am hoping we are going to make it to Hawaii. No more germany.. I wanted to go there but I dont think I Want to live there for 3 years. who knows.. things change when you have 2 kids.. ya know?
Anyway.. I was trying to pass time. Serisouly.. nothing going on. Hope to hear from you soon.. if you are reading this lol.
- Love – me
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AquaGoddess |
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November 8, 2005 ,
7:30 am |
I almost forgot that I had my online journal! frown I noticed it?s been about a month since I have made an entry, but it seems like a pattern. I am not bothered by the spacing as long as I get my point across in each entry.
One of the last things I talked about was moving while Charles was deployed. About a week after the last entry was posted, I decided to move to McHenry; only because my mother moved out too late for me to go down there. Charles was able to get some money for me to go and we packed everything up! I left for McHenry on Oct 20th. But, I went home on October 24th! ? See, here is the thing. Once we started to pack everything I realized that it was a bad idea that I move. We argued a bit about it and decided it was the best thing. ? Once I got to McHenry I was miserable? wait let me correct that… Once I got through Chicago on my drive up there I was miserable. It hit me like nothing else; I didn?t want to be there. I tried to adjust to the first day, but it felt impossible. I thought to myself that I was an adult who did not need to be living with her parent. I missed Charles terribly. I should not have left him there so close to deployment.
Things worked out, though. Charles is not set to deploy until Nov 29 at this time. That would have been over a month of us being alone and missing all that time together. I am happier since I have been home and I have had the opportunity to make a new friend, since somehow I lost a friend also.
I don?t know what happened with Sean but he just disappeared from my life. I went to McHenry; saw him a few times and then I left. I can understand that he might be a bit upset that I left, but I didn?t do anything to him that was bad. I might be over reacting a bit because the only proof that I have of this is he is never online anymore. Before McHenry he was online all the time, and since I have gotten back he is never on my messenger list? but he is online (either he blocked me or removed me). I know this because he is apart of my Yahoo! 360 page. Oh well, unless he comes to me with information I cannot really say much more.
I made a new friend, again. I am really excited this time. I might have said that before about the other ?friends,? but this is a serious friend. I meet Tina through MySpace on November 2nd and in person on the 4th.She lives right here in Clarksville, and we have SO MUCH in common. I have seen her twice now! smile She is originally from Germany, and has been in the states for about 5 months now. We have had so much fun hanging out and talking on the phone that I really believe that she is going to become a life long friend.
We like to joke around a lot. For example we decided that our first meeting was our first date because we were both nervous. Then on the second date, there was the uncomfortable silence. I have learned so much about her that it feels like we have known each other for a long time. I think I can honestly say that this is the first time I have felt connected to a girl, in a friendly way, and basically I feel like we have become instant best friends.
Tina is the best thing to happen to me since Layla and Charles. She has given me the opportunity to actually be happy and not have to dread another day. It?s not like I don?t like Charles, it has nothing to do with Charles? it has to do with my sanity. I was going crazy not being able to talk to anyone or not be able to get out with out having any alone time.
School is going okay, I suppose. My grades are pretty good, except for my Algebra grade. I think the Algebra grade is so gone that it could be impossible to fix it up in time for finals. But I am not sure if I want to be in college or not anymore. I really don?t know what I want to do with my life. I change my mind about this more then I change my damn underwear! I kind of want to go back to my foreign language major but this time just major in German. I have learned so much from Tina about Germany and the language that it just seems like a good idea. I can still find work with a German major. I did fall behind a bit in college with the move but I feel I am pretty much caught up. I wish that I could go to a trade school and just learn German and not have to take any of the other dumb classes.
Who knows I am not waiting money; I have not taken any unnecessary classes, yet. So I better get on track, fast.
Layla is doing pretty good. She is just about 21 months now! I think we are getting closer as mother and daughter and she is also getting closer to Charles. It?s so amazing to watch a child grow up. I didn?t know I would feel like this before I had a child. I am so happy that I am willing to have another baby right now (but 2 would be my cut off). smile She is not quite talking yet, but I think she has the ability and wont use it. She also has been using her leap pad more correctly lately. It?s so cute how she just brings it over to either me or Charles and just plays and learns.
Of course there have been some down times with her. She is very independent and thinks she is in control. She is spoiled! There have been days, like today, where she is just grumpy and nearly cries all day.
That?s going to be about it for now. I do have more to say, but who knows when I will write again. Maybe tomorrow, if I remember.
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