Finished my first mini ‘project’ in a while. It felt good, to be doing something different other than eat, sleep, work and dance.
Don’t get me wrong, I love flamenco and as it becomes more challenging I find myself more interested in it. It’s just that the fire’s gone MIA in the last couple of weeks. This proves to be a challenge since there’s a public performance in two frickin’ weeks and I look as if I’m in another world when rehearsing. I’m surprised Madame Principal hasn’t called me out on my glazed and distant expression yet.
Pity the other world isn’t home. I thought that coming back almost okay meant that I could face real life again. Instead, I return to find a whole new set of challenges. Fights I cannot engage in because it is not mine. Loss of compassion. Kindness shoved aside for dollars and cents. I find myself refusing to detach. Because if I do, I believe I am no better than those who see numbers rather than people.
You would think the tailspin would bring out the best in all of us. What makes us reach out to others. What makes us curious about the world. What makes us love. What makes us human. Instead it’s every man for himself. Yet in the grand scheme of things we are but a minuscule existence in the universe.
We’re such a fucking selfish species.
